FU – a Fundamental Understanding…..

so my new years resolution was to try and curb my swearing…..ya, not so easy.

I will say however I have removed it from my writing ;) which is easier but a feat nonetheless. Other than a few occasions where my blood is boiling I have done a pretty decent job at removing the f-bomb from my slang :) it is not an adjective! or a verb for that matter :P haha

I definitely swear when I’m angry – which is not good. I was reading this whole article about how swearing is actually showing a person’s inability to say what they really mean and/or feel. So, I’ve tried replacingF YOU COLIN!” with “Babe, you not posing for a blog picture really hurts my feelings, I’m gonna need to take a breather”  ;) or “Are you F&%*^((*^*%^*$%$ serious?!”  with “Oh, my I am absolutely astonished that they only gave me this much notice, I guess it’s a good time for me to challenge myself to new levels:) haha and so on and so forth.

A repercussion of this new way of communicating is that it has caused silent forms of negative expression to occur……

Ya, so this is what’s transpired as a result – the FU finger ;) how dare you!

Don’t start feeling all sorry for Colin because I get it right back! He is not as nice as I make him out to be….

Yep, that’s right! your eyes are not deceiving you – that is Colin giving me the FU finger right in my face camera lens. how dare you!

but that’s not all….

even Rex, although he’s not able to put his paw middle “finger” up, definitely gives us his version of the FU finger…..

what do you mean you’re running alone? …..how dare you!

Logan on the other hand is only full of goodness, happiness and has the sweetest smiles ever and a personality that is all that and a bag of chips ;) He has not yet been tainted by the #%&^%$&^$’s that reside in our household. 

I’m kind of a big deal

He is the main reason I want to curb this bad habit. I don’t want him to be spitting out F-bombs left right and center because where do you think I got it from??

Thanks mom ;)

That is the current picture I have on my phone – so I see it every time she calls ;) She’d probably give me another one if I didn’t throw some blame on my father too….

so I will.

He is definitely a contributing factor. There was a lot of swearing on his part – he was an angry, scary swearer too. I was swearing since a very young age because of it…..old habits die hard!

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Side Note: I also want you guys to know that you were one of my main sources of inspiration – not many of you swear! I love it :) I know by January 2013 I’ll have conditioned myself to not substitute swearing for feelings :D YAY! although there may still be so FU finger shots… so don’t kick my trash ;)

[hopefully this post doesn't offend anyone - as that's not my intent at all xo]

——————————————————————————————–

Questions:

1. was there a bad habit you were/are trying to kick this year??

2. do you swear? 

3. what was the last nice thing someone did for you??

Colin left me a ready-to-go portion of rice and chicken balls for when I got home from work yesterday :D I was very pleased xoxox

112 comments on “FU – a Fundamental Understanding…..

  1. I just showed my officemate the pictures of Rex and Logan, she said both of them are very cute!

    I am trying to give up soda this year, it is going alright (we’ll see if it happens or not). Just reducing my intake would be good enough for me.

    I do swear but not all the time and definitely not in public, in front of my family, Mike’s family, etc. I don’t swear on my blog either. It’s usually only when I am really mad. We don’t have kids but if we did I wouldn’t even swear if I was mad, they are like sponges! (One of our friends has a two-year-old and he is DEFINITELY picking up some swear words).

  2. Hahaha oh Ali you do make me laugh, you are a lot like my best friend from school! I think it’s kind of funny that your parents and Colin all swear too, at least then it’s not like you’re on your own :-p

    My bad habit is… biting my nails. I’m so embarrassed that I still do it now at 18 but it’s so hard to stop because I do it when I’m stressed and I get stressed quite easily at the moment! I’m hoping to have stopped in a month and a half’s time for when I turn 19 but I’m not sure it’ll happen that quickly, wearing nude nail varnish everyday as a reminder!!

    • That’s so crazy that I’ve never replied to this comment! sorry sophie :) and I love that I remind you of your best friend.

      Ive never bit my nails but I do rip them off which is no better :(

  3. I am trying to kick my sugar habits. I also have a tendency to curse like a sailor. It’s gross.

    Oh, my boyfriend made me hot chocolate because I was cold and had a sore throat.

    • sugar is so hard. I’ve heard having dark chocolate in the late afternoon works??? it’s when our body naturally craves sugar.

      and that’s so nice of your b/f and I hope your throat feels better soon Sabrina :D

  4. oh my gosh this is my WORST habit. I think I picked it up because I hang out with a lot of guys & needed to “fit in” so to speak. I’ve really been working on it this year, or at least eliminating certain key words (If i had to give up ‘d*mn’ I’d probably have to take a vow of silence).

    I also have a really hard time controlling my facial expressions – rolling my eyes, clenching my jaw, etc. Apparently my classmates LOOOVE watching me/making fun of me for it, so this is on the list of things to work on as well

    • Yes, I’m convinced hanging out with guys and trying to be cool probably made it worse…..and that is so mean that your classmates make fun of your facial expressions. I’d start making them even MORE intense and crazy to try and throw them off ;)

      also – I still say dammit and damn….I guess those should come off too?!!?

    • Ya, see ….that’s my biggest fear – that Logan will become like me and isn’t the point of being a parent to try and evolve and make your children better than you ??? :)

      I have a trucker mouth, so this is a GREAT goal for me :D

  5. I definitely swear, but not as bad as it could be. When I get really really mad, some words slip out, and there are some expressions that I’m just not willing to give up! I mean, come on–sometimes the phrase “clusterF***” is far more descriptive than saying “wow, that was a mess.” :)

    However, I know that I’ll probably eliminate it all entirely once I have children, so good for you for making the effort!

  6. LOL i loved this post. i’m not gonna lie…both me and kev swear up a storm. i’ve had to work REALLY hard not to curse on my blog because it seems like no one else in this community really did so I didnt want to look like a tool…but yeah, kevin is far worse then me, sometimes i tell him to tone it down, especially around his nephew. i’m HOPING i can kick it when I have kids, because like you as well…i got it because my mom and her family swear up a storm, hahaha.

    • again, I think we are so similar ;) When I first started this blog Colin would always make me change my swearing and sensor me – he said I wouldn’t want to insult people.

      To be honest though I’ve come to love the lack of swearing in this community and, as I mentioned in this post, I think everyone has inspired me to make an honest effort towards not cursing :D

      not that there’s anything wrong with a good old FU sometimes ;)

  7. I think if my husband told me to f*** myself, he’d be out of the house and sleeping at his brother’s. I can’t imagine ever saying it to him. What an awful thing to say to someone you love, even if you’re pissed off.

    • well unfortunately I was raise differently than you and so that was common place. hence why I wish to change it about myself.

      I don’t even know why I’m responding to this fake email though.

  8. Oh man… I swear like a sailor. It’s totally my Dad’s fault — I bet my Dad and your Dad would be two peas in a pod. My Dad gets creative with his outbursts, too — or maybe I’m not as bad or deep into the swearing world as I think, because some of the stuff he spits out is PRICELESS!

    I do need to stop swearing though. It’s not attractive on us ladies at all, and illustrates just how little patience I have. *oops* NOT TO MENTION, I’m Christian. Whatever, we’re all hypocrites –er, human — it’ll take time:)

    • hahaha I love that we’re blaming the parents – true story ;) haha

      and it doesn’t matter if you’re Christian…..all belief systems are about doing your best and trying not to judge your fellow man :) I think you do great in both those categories.

      I am wanting to meet your dad now though :D

  9. I only swear when I’m really angry… but its still not a great habit. I do on the other hand love learning swear words in spanish… it doesn’t count ;)

    When I was in brownies we used to keep bracelets and tie knots in them every time we did a good deed… would probably help to do it as adults as well! :)

    • What a great idea – I actually have NO problem doing good deads and THRIVE on keeping the spirit of humanity alive. If someone is mean to me I always try to choose “nice” over “right” b/c it instills peoples faith in humanity.

      I want ta bracelet though :D and maybe I could do it in reverse….like give up a piece of jewelry every time I swear ;)

  10. First of all, I LOVE that picture of Rex. I’m quite familiar with that expression, though with my dog, it was more “What do you mean you didn’t scramble an extra egg for me?! Aren’t you supposed to be making MY breakfast?!”

    Second, I’m a horrible about swearing. Dad still swears I learned it from people at school, but we ALL know my brother and I learned it from him. When he gets upset (at least once a day), you can hear him swearing every word you can think of (and some you’ve probably never heard) from one end of the house to the other. Though, my outbursts normally only occur when my brain completely shuts down in anger or frustration. And I’m around kids and other people enough that “FU” usually ends up coming out as “fudgemonkeys” or something similar. The adults get it, the kids think it’s hilarious.

    • hahaha – I love the asking for food disappointment face….I’ll have to try and capture that ;)

      your comment reminds me of “A Christmas Story” – ever seen it?? where the kid says “fudge” – but he really didn’t say fudge….and the mother is like “where did you hear that from?” even though the father is a constant angry curser. haha love it!

      Parents….now I am one and desperately don’t want to be the one throwing curse words around while blaming my child’s swearing on television ;)

      • My family LOVES that movie and every time it gets to that part (or any part where the dad is cursing or Ralphie is lying about where he “learned” certain words), we all turn and look at dad. This has been happening for multiple times a year for about a decade. We aren’t sure if he’s just willfully ignoring us subtley pointing it out or what.

        • Ah Ralphie! I forgot the kids name….and I love that you guys know it and all look to dad at that very part – it’s Colin’s favourite xmas movie so he’ll be so pleased to read this comment :D haha

  11. Yep I’m a swearer and grew up in a swearing househould with a swearing father. I swear on my blog, but not the f-bomb. I pretty much never use the f-bomb online or written. The rest are good and I try to use them sparingly in my writing so they actually have some impact like “oh wow, he’s swearing.”

    Unfortunately, when I’m frustrated in everyday situations and I likely to drop every word in the book. I’ve slowly been replacing the curse words with non-sensical phrases that seem to have the same release for me. My favorite is “fart knuckles”. No idea where it came from, but I say it a lot instead of cursing. Unfortunately my 5 and 6 year old know em all too. My first grader has been having trouble at school and most recently told another kid that she would “kick him in the nuts”. This came from watching Ghostbusters 2. We thought it was funny in the movie, not so funny now, fart knuckles!

    • fart knuckles! now that’s a good one ;) and I know this is bad but as a woman, I’d be proud if my little girl was already standing up to and threatening boys :) haha

  12. Ugh- cutting back on the swearing was a resolution a couple of years ago. I got better, but it’s come back a little bit ;) . My kids are all old enough to imitate what I say, so I have to watch it. Also, my family and the husbands family are NOT the swearing type, so they do not get it/understand at all. They think I am the devil. I’m good with that.

    • hahahaha THIS comment was epic! “they think I’m the devil.I’m good with that” – hahaha :)

      oh thank you for making me smile.

      and on the kid note, see Logan is now 2 so I really have to start getting rid of any slip ups. I’d hate for him to tell me, or worse a peer, to Foff !!

  13. Oh I get that F-U look from my dog all the time! I try to tell her that I’m running to far for her old legs to take her but she doesn’t understand. Usually the F-U look is followed by ears back, wide eyes, puppy dog look in a final attempt to lure me into a shorter run that she can participate in…it usually works :) .

    I’m actually not a swearer at all and when I swear on very rare occasions I usually shock my friends!

    • Oh I love those people!!!! – see I have always been boisterous and outgoing so nothing I do shocks anyone. I have always admired those individuals who only say something when needed – they really get their point across and everyone listens!

  14. #2. No I do not swear….hate it personally…there are so many better words than the FU. Although, when I get really mad, tense, upset I do tend to use the word SH$T a lot. Then my kids give me the …..”"Oh, no MOM is really UPSET look” and I have to apologize.

    With that said…your post made me really “laugh out loud” when I saw the photo of your DOG! He totally looks like he is thinking FU! HA! Hilarious!!

    #3. Parents sent me early flowers for my B-day . ;-)

    And finally, I never say Oh God! or OMGod either…I just don’t like it and my son heard from our paster that saying that is using God’s name in vain so he catches EVERYONE doing it and a lot of people have stopped saying it around us just b/c they were tired of Owen pointing it out. Again, we just say Oh, Goodness….

    However, we are not goody two shoes….we have a lot of other issues…just to make that clear. ha!

    • I would say most people hate swearing Kathy, so you’re not alone. It definitely isn’t socially desirable. and thanks about Rex – he DOES look like he’s telling me off doesn’t he :P haha

      and yes those flowers were beautiful!

      I am guilty of saying OMG – but usually if I’m speaking I say Oh My Gosh! – I am not religious, but still try to be respectful of others. However, most times when I’m typing I write “OMG” b/c I find sometimes it looks weird when I write “OMGosh” so hopefully I’ve never offended you :D xo

  15. I pretty much don’t swear anymore,, it really depends who I ‘m with. I substituted fruit for the ‘F’ word around the kids. Works!
    That pic of your mom is priceless!

    • ok, so funny that you say you substitute fruit – we have these friends with a baby girl and around thanksgiving and halloween they would use the word “pumpkin” it caught on really fast ;) I used “ridiculous” to eliminate “retarded” out of my vocab so I think picking some easy replacement words may be better for me :) thanks!!!

  16. Okay, this post was hilarious. However, I disagree with one point. I don’t feel at all that swearing limits our ability to say what we really mean. I feel like I can convey a LOT with one very loud and well-placed F-bomb. LOL

    • Hey Pam! thanks for visiting :) – and I agreed with you. if you really want the story – I let an f-bomb slip out at an authority figure, I’m 29 so there’s no reason to act like a teen. It made me feel embarrassed that I couldn’t properly express myself, so when I found this site about stopping swearing I thought the same as you – always thought swearing was a great form of expression ;) hahaha

      so yes, maybe you are right and sometimes it IS needed :D

  17. I’m taking the year off from attacking a bad habit and breaking it. I needed a breather.

    I have a mouth for sure.

    The last nice thing that someone did? Some @&^% just apologized for being a total !@$& to me yesterday. That was nice.

  18. Hahaha my dog definitely gives me the FU face, too. Usually when I don’t throw his ball soon enough.

    Good for you for tackling your swearing! Long-time habits can be so hard to kick. I’m currently trying to kick my caffeine habit. I know just how comforting and easy it is to keep doing business as usual :)

    • you’re totally right. Actually I think today since posting this post I’ve sworn more than I have all year! I seriously need to pick a word for each term and change it up! :D thanks for visiting

  19. haha love all the pictures!! I will admit I am an angry swearer, it slips out. I feel it is a great way to express yourself, get the anger out and not bottle it in :)
    It’s a hard habit to break! But I have been forced to do so around my nephew, the little ones repeat way too much!

  20. I have a potty mouth, but it’s generally more like “I can’t find my F#$%ing keys!”. I’ve never actually told anyone “F&%$ you!”. My official 2012 resolution is to be more like you and tell everyone in my family to F off at some point this year.

  21. Hahaha I loved this. I swear sometimes but not to often…never in front of an authority figure. It’s like my throat closes up and I just can’t say it. I think my mom is the only adult person in my family I’ve ever dropped an f-bomb in front of. actually that is a lie, when I was 4 my family was getting ready for my cousins wedding and we were waiting in the lobby. I didn’t have a bow in my hair and I guess I felt like I was being ignored so I loudly yelled “doesn’t anybody care that I’m not f—ing ready?” and my mom’s reaction was like well at least she used it in the right context, haha.

    • hahaha oh your mom sounds so funny :) I love the picture of everyone just freezing as that comes out of your mouth :D and I hope you did get that bow in your hair ;)

  22. ha ha too funny! I am definitely guilty of having a potty mouth. Now that I have neices and nephews that are Logans age I try to be more cautious of it because kids totally pick up on it quick.

    That picture of Logan made my day and is absolutely adorable. What a sweet little guy. :)

    • exactly – I have to be really careful. Even if I slam my knee into something, or whatnot I have to bite my lip so I don’t swear.

      and thanks for being such a great friend Rachelle :D xo

  23. Cute post… cute pics.

    I don’t swear much. When I was younger I used to say ‘pissed off’ a lot cause it pissed off my Mother – a lot!

    I agree with the guy who says people who use these words have trouble expressing themselves… honestly I think it makes the person sound very unintelligent. That is just me… What I really hate is hearing kids say the F word a lot.

    And sometimes it just sound violent and scary to me, too.

    Once my Mother and I were having lunch in a very nice restaurant and there was a group of men nearby, obviously a business situation, and they were using very foul language, a lot! So I went over very nicely and quietly told them that there were embarassing my Mother … wow! They were so apologetic and one actually came over and apologized to her.. they likely honestly hadn’t realized how awful it sounded to other people.

    I like these kinds of discussions… obviously! :)

    • it does sound violent ….and scary. I remember being scared as a kid. I definitely don’t want Logan to feel that way :) I hope I can make this change!

      and I loved the story about those business men and your mother – it showcases my point in my other post The Four Agreements – those men, though rude, had no idea they were offending you and your mom until you spoke up (which was awesome btw) and then they could learn and apologize. GREAT story.

      and these discussions sometimes get me into trouble, but I have to keep it honest ;)

  24. 1.I am trying to kick the “lemon pound cake” habit that I have. I addicted to these crazy baked goods that are offered at my neighborhood Starbucks. Of course, I have been trying to break this one for about 2 years now!
    2. Yes, but not nearly as much as I used to swear. When I was younger and in the military I swore all the time. Now, I really have to be pissed or trying to make a really intense point to use the f-bomb.
    3. I believe it was about 3 weeks ago. I was near my nail techs place of business so I just dropped by, gave her a hug and then left.

    • oh man, that is a habit. I never used to like baked goods, now I eat too much. I always notice how heavy I feel the next day…but I still can’t help myself.

      oh man, you were in the military! that should be a reason to swear.

      and I love getting hugs :D

  25. I feel guilty now – unfortunately I do swear. I call it my middle-age rebellion against my strict religious upbringing (and too much hanging around foul-mouthed males at uni) And the middle finger – or as my once 6-yo son said – the rude finger, gets used almost exclusively for Coach Chris. I think he likes the attention.

    And I keep forgetting to say I’m from Australia not the UK

    • why feel guilty, I don’t care if people swear – I just told you I swear! not to mention posted FU finger pics ;)

      It’s just my goal to stop for Logan’s sake. Or at least be more conscious of it – as right now it could just slip out.

      Oh Australia! sorry I guess that makes way more sense. but the English also call bangs – fringe ;)

  26. Well, I fucking swear like a sailor, thats no secret! :P One of my goals has been learn to use more polite language as well. I dont know how well I am doing but I am willing to bet I’ve gotten better since I left the warehouse!! :) F-bombs got dropped left, right and center in that place, its was nuts!!

    And WOW how long has it been since I have seen Logan?? HE LOOKS HUGE!!!

    See you Saturday :D

    • you just swore here :P haha I swear a lot – hence why I need to get rid of it. Should’ve tried harder earlier on. and i can imagine it would be like that in the warehouse, glad you’re outta there :) and can’t wait to see you Saturday – we should do our usual – ie: pretend we’re the coolest and sit in the corner

      Oh and Logan is huge – tall!

  27. I swear like a &%^$#%$*()& trucker! It gets pretty bad because I work with just my dad and we’ll both get mad dealing with the IRS or state or something and start swearing. I’m “trying” to cut back, but not very hard.
    The bad habit I am trying to kick this year is eating. I eat WAY too much and drink WAY too much so I am trying to cut back in both areas. Hasn’t really happened yet, but there is still a lot of year left. :)
    That picture of Rex is adorable. I get those looks from Sandy (my dog) whenever I am going somewhere without her. Or eating and not giving her any. Or within 10 feet of the Milk Bone jar and not giving her one….. :)

    • ya people have called me a trucker once or twice…maybe a lot in my life too ;) and eating is so hard to stop. I have gotten better at not eating after I feel full but it took a long time for me to get there. Normally, if it tastes good, I want more, well ALL of it :) hahaha

      and I noticed Sandy’s pic on your fb profile pic and wanted to tell you she is soooooo cute :D xoxo

      • Yeah, I want to finish all of the good food. Could be why I need to lose some weight. :)
        The dog in my picture is actually Molly, our 14 year old dog we lost last March. I haven’t been able to bring myself to change it yet, she was the best dog ever. Sandy is the goofy German Shepherd mix we adopted after we lost Molly. She is a CRAZY 1 1/2 year old who has made herself completely at home and thinks she gets to go wherever we go now. :)

  28. oh boy does this post speak to me! I am a potty mouth and I think I was since becoming an English major. I never swear in front of my students but I do make up some innovative replacement words when I swear at home. I used to say Dammit all the time until my 3 year old started saying it! It was ugly. I had to stop. I love Rex’s expression. Our late dog Kelly used to give it to me often.

  29. Omg Allie! I’ve been daily reading you for ages and I think this blog made it a must read. Totalllllllly in the same boat!!! I’m not a big swearer, but lord do I give the finger like it’s my job!! You’re awesome :) Running helps to decrease my “silent swearing.” Thank god for that! :)

    • hahaha – that’s actually probably better that you just give the finger….probably easier to tuck it away ;) and thanks so much for reading me and tagging me up today oxoxox :D

  30. I swear. A lot. The husband says I have the “mouth of a sailor”. Geez. But, I don’t use it when I’m writing. Occasionally I will, but for the most part, I just don’t. Kudos for you, big time, for quitting swearing. I think if I had a kid I would too :)

    • it is soooo hard to quit swearing, i slip up often, but being conscious and correcting it are steps in the right direction, just wish I’d tackled it sooner.

      and swear while you can ;) haha

    • as in “You’re number 1″ like the positive chant?!? that’s kinda cool Mike. maybe that should be my replacement. I can see it now…..YOU ……are number one ;)

  31. I have a swearing problem as well, I accidental dropped an f bomb at work today out of frustration. Lol Luckily I work in a VERY casual office environment! :)

    I can’t really say Ive tried to cut back I just try to be more aware of not swearing in certain situations. However, get a few drinks in me and I curse like a sailor, must be the Irish in me :)

    Good luck with kickin the habit!

    • Thanks Heidi – and I hear you re: drinking and swearing. However, usually when I’m drinking it’s in an atmosphere where everyone is drinking, so nobody minds ;) haha

  32. Haha! Hilarious! Love that big time picture of Lo and Rex’s face!! :) I don’t swear, but I didn’t grow up around much swearing… I do say crap a lot, which I’ve been thinking I probably don’t want my baby girl repeating… so I’ve been trying not to use it. So far, nothing has changed, but at least I have good intentions, right?! Haha. Habits are hard to kick. I don’t know that I’ve ever really gotten rid of a bad one… like eating ice cream in the middle of the night. I’m still not sure whether I want to file that one under bad or good.

    • crap is better than other things ;) and Jess you and Cec have such a nice family :D that’s good that you don’t have to worry about swearing in front of your little one and I consider eating ice cream a good thing – all the time ;) xo

  33. You are too funny! My parents never swore, and I don’t know if that’s the reason, but I never picked up the habit… love that Logan is the sweet one. I’d say of all of us, L is the one swearing these days, with the melt downs we’ve been having lately! :)

    • it most likely is. I’d say that you’d have to be around it a lot for it to become so second-nature. otherwise it’s just the odd curse here and there. and YES! the meltdowns. being a 2 year old seems really rough :(

  34. Oooo, I swear terribly yet the people at work still seemed surprised when I let a profanity slip… I must be much nicer at work than at home LOL My bad habit that I am trying to kick this year is my negativity towards some people in my life (Yeah, I am talking about you Mother-In-Law!)… But they are really testing my resolve!

  35. HAHAHA…oh my gosh me and my love affair with cursing. in the past i could prolly put a sailor to shame, and it would surprise people that ‘innocent looking me’ had such a mouth! but i’ve gotten better, mostly because like u, i felt like maybe i was loving the f bomb too much..haha.

    now though, i still curse when it’s warranted…i just try to be more on guard if i’m in the company of those who don’t like it so much. :P

    GOOD F’ING LUCK!! ;)

  36. I used to work with kids, so I have a well developed filter. Growing up, my parents pretty much never swore, so I didn’t much. I do occasionally now, but not on a regular basis. Swear words have more power when they are less expected. ;)

  37. I’m not much of a swearer and I never do on the blog. I have to be really mad and I must admit that there’s nothing that will sober my friends up faster than me yelling and dropping the F-bomb. People start behaving and acting right!

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